Faith and Disappointment

Like black tire hanging from tree, faith and disappointment swing forward and back, forward and back. Dichotomous states weigh heavy strain on branch’s support. Hope for future. Fear of past repeats. Branch creaks as tire becomes heavier with each passing swing adding force to make it go higher and higher until… it breaks.

Unoccupied, tire hangs in stillness. Branch remains strong. Tree remains vital and connected to other trees. No swing, no strain, no creak, no break… No fun.

Still tire invites movement; invites action. Can tire swing without becoming heavy and burdensome to branch? Can dichotomous states exist in moderation to allow experience of life without careening out of control? Wishes and dreams put into action without attachment to outcome, or timing, swings the tire just enough to have fun without breaking the branch.

Judgement

Like thunder, the booming voice of judgment rolls out in ripples as it licks the aura of other only to echo back and penetrate identity. Lightening strikes out another chip of self-esteem, as longing to push away self-realization satiates for the moment. Strive to raze back from the ashes by throwing another ball of BOOM only to burn further down.

Thunder penetrates and lightening burns bringing opportunity of transformation. Renovate self in the wake of casted ripples. Become a phoenix of discernment, which casts nothing: not to other, and therefore, not to self.

Expectations

Like hunter stalking prey, want from others follows as a dark shadow plaguing its victim. Hunger for energy, praise, absolution, love, apologies, acknowledgement of existence, worthiness…leaves empty belly.

Hunter insists on stalking the same prey over and over and all the while not catching it…hunter dies. Not catching prey does not reflect hunter’s worthiness as a hunter, but rather prey’s worthiness to escape. The meeting of hunter’s needs lies elsewhere. Hunter must travel a different trail.

Introspection:

To expect certain attitudes from someone who won’t feed you leaves you hungry for more praise, more apologies and more acknowledgements. To continue seeking these from the same person who won’t give them, is to kill yourself from starvation. Either seek what you hunger for from within yourself, or surround yourself with those who appreciate what you offer them as food. Both is preferable.

Risk

Through door of jeopardy enters all things. Once possessed, undeniably again lost. What price paid for that desired? What cost to not have desired? No risk then no love, no met needs, no juice of life. Cost? Yes. Worth it? Yes. Meaning enters through gate of jeopardy too.